I'm a little surprised to see a poet -- a fairly good poet even -- such as Mellencamp say such a thing -- aren't poetry and music some of those attempts we make at reaching across the divide to each other?

I don't think we can ever fully know someone, even ourselves, because we change. But that's what makes those moments of connection all the more special.

*hugs you across the Internet*
*sends comfort to your SIL and her sister*