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Snarky Lorraine is Snarky (hormones are involved)
Dear Fandom,
Nobody says, "Ngghhh," when they are making love. Or, "Mgggghhhhh," or "garggggggh." These are the kinds of noises made by feral sheep as they leap from crag to crag delicately on cloven hooves. Or possibly the beginnings of a courtship ritual between the pirate leaders of two warring factions. Not the sexy ululations of your OTP on the cusp of the little death.
"The Captain" and "the Vulcan" politely request that they be referred to by name, or at the very least, the appropriate pronouns. "The younger man" and "the vampire" remind you that while legislation on the use of epithets is slow to move through fandom tribunal, backbuttoning in that eventuality is swift and fierce.
JENSEN ACKLES DOES NOT WANT INSIDE OUR COLLECTIVE UNDERTHINGS. This is perhaps the saddest of all truths I have to tell, dearest Fandom, because We know how good We'd be for him, don't We? Almost as good as Jared. Or Chris Kane. Or under the most dire, and intriguing, of circumstances, the CMM. What is his problem anyway? If launching ourselves down stairwells and wishing HIS BETROTHED would choke already on her own vomit aren't turn ons, I don't know what is.
Jennifer Keller is [and I learned a new word last night; brace yourselves for this one because it's aces] hoshit fabulous! And when she and Rodney do it, Sheppard presses his ear to the wall and he cries while he masturbates (just like Sam Winchester!) because Keller is just that smoking and he wants her too. Well, on the nights Elizabeth is otherwise engaged.
Pavel Chekov. The new little black dress, people. Take note.
WHERE IS THE CALDWELL/SHEPPARD? (Sorry, that one's just habit.)
And finally, I'm almost one hundred percent positive that Lucifer didn't write SGU. He got carpal tunnel writing the first three seasons of SG-1 [Hell, I got carpal tunnel of the eyes watching them] and had to retire.
Sincerely,
Lorraine
ETA PS If y'all wanted to make me black and white Jo icons that wouldn't be the end of the world.
Nobody says, "Ngghhh," when they are making love. Or, "Mgggghhhhh," or "garggggggh." These are the kinds of noises made by feral sheep as they leap from crag to crag delicately on cloven hooves. Or possibly the beginnings of a courtship ritual between the pirate leaders of two warring factions. Not the sexy ululations of your OTP on the cusp of the little death.
"The Captain" and "the Vulcan" politely request that they be referred to by name, or at the very least, the appropriate pronouns. "The younger man" and "the vampire" remind you that while legislation on the use of epithets is slow to move through fandom tribunal, backbuttoning in that eventuality is swift and fierce.
JENSEN ACKLES DOES NOT WANT INSIDE OUR COLLECTIVE UNDERTHINGS. This is perhaps the saddest of all truths I have to tell, dearest Fandom, because We know how good We'd be for him, don't We? Almost as good as Jared. Or Chris Kane. Or under the most dire, and intriguing, of circumstances, the CMM. What is his problem anyway? If launching ourselves down stairwells and wishing HIS BETROTHED would choke already on her own vomit aren't turn ons, I don't know what is.
Jennifer Keller is [and I learned a new word last night; brace yourselves for this one because it's aces] hoshit fabulous! And when she and Rodney do it, Sheppard presses his ear to the wall and he cries while he masturbates (just like Sam Winchester!) because Keller is just that smoking and he wants her too. Well, on the nights Elizabeth is otherwise engaged.
Pavel Chekov. The new little black dress, people. Take note.
WHERE IS THE CALDWELL/SHEPPARD? (Sorry, that one's just habit.)
And finally, I'm almost one hundred percent positive that Lucifer didn't write SGU. He got carpal tunnel writing the first three seasons of SG-1 [Hell, I got carpal tunnel of the eyes watching them] and had to retire.
Sincerely,
Lorraine
ETA PS If y'all wanted to make me black and white Jo icons that wouldn't be the end of the world.
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"The younger man" and "the vampire" remind you that while legislation on the use of epithets is slow to move through fandom tribunal, backbuttoning in that eventuality is swift and fierce.
Ah, that brings back memories of Buffy fandom... a platin-blond vampire, a dark vampire, and a slayer walk into a bar...
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Imagining this in your RL voice makes it *even better*.
:)
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*sigh*
Ah, yes. Buffy. LOL There should have been an, "Oi," in that rant.
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Also, what I really think is that I need more MPREG. Like a lot more MPREG. Sad sad MPREG.
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:)
*snugs*
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IDK BUT IF THE CALDWELL/RONON IS THERE PLS TO BE BRINGING SOME.
Also, I'm pretty sure I've said "nnngh" during sex, though I can't be 100% positive as we weren't recording at the time.
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YES! Like the one where Rodney was mpregged, and John convinced him to keep the baby. But then Rodney diiiied! And John had to be a baby-daddy all by himseeeelf! That one was awesome!
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my new personal fanon.
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I want Colonel Sumner to get pregnant. With Bates's baby. That has got to be the ultimate in mpregging.
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That is a wonderful, wonderful thought. *holds it to her heart*
Also, I'm pretty sure I've said "nnngh" during sex, though I can't be 100% positive as we weren't recording at the time.
This is impressive. :) I usually just say, "Is it gonna bother you if I keep reading?" *g*
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&hearts
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Also, RONON/CALDWELL FTMFW!
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Caldwell would be so awkward and insecure and RONON WOULD LOVE HIM SO HARD!
AND THEN THEY COULD HAVE BABIES.
I'm starting to hyperventilate with the awesome.
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Can you imagine the joy of a John Sheppard forced to play go between with those two?
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That is a truncated version of how I feel on the subject.
Also, when I called him Leader of Atlantis, what I really meant to type was Commander of the Daedalus. He's only Leader of Atlantis in his own mind.
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*G* I wondered about that.
But now I'm imagining the semi-evil AU in which Caldwell is leader of Atlantis, Sheppard wants the job, and Ronon is caught between them.
If this gets written, it is YOUR. FAULT.
Omg your icon. *distracted*
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Yes! That! So do the Scientist and the Pilot! I was reading a fic where John and Rodney were having sexytiems in a plane (that John wasn't flying, it was a declassifcation fic) and suddenly I read "the pilot" and I thought the pilot had discovered them and decided to join in!
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I accept any all blame that shall be incurred from this incident
With his pants down.
/deadpan
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I guess I really don't like when non-word sounds are represented in words. I'd rather read, he grunted or she wailed than nnngh and aaaaaaaaaah. LOL
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*wipes eyes*
Poor Lorne was feeling all kinds of left out and just *had* to join in.
Re: I accept any all blame that shall be incurred from this incident
M!Ronon: *glowers*
M!Caldwell: *smirks*
M!Sheppard: *pokes Caldwell* My Specialist. Ronon, put your damn pants on.
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Re: I accept any all blame that shall be incurred from this incident
*wipes eyes*
And then Ronon asks Woolsey for relationship advice. Because he's there too, naturally. And Woolsey is surprisingly astute and kinda gets off on Ronon's frank explanations of his feelings.
M!Ronon: "So you don't think I should offer to suck him off in the control tower."
M! Woolsey: *drools* "It's certainly unprofessional. I need more evidence to make a decision. Sit beside me on the couch."
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Re: I accept any all blame that shall be incurred from this incident
Re: I accept any all blame that shall be incurred from this incident
*loves*
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The index is here, series starts here and the bit with Rodney and Kavanaugh fighting over which college their kid will go to is here
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And Miko is so wise. I love love love what fandom has done with her. If they make a movie, I hope she's in it.
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Oh Miko! She has the absolute best fanon characterization (I'm still in awe of the AU where she was a leather-clad dominatrix. It's always the quiet ones!)
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OMFG THIS THREAD! Ronon/Woolsey! I... I don't even have words for the awesome.
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Ronon/Woolsey is like those tiny cupcakes from Trader Joes. So decadent and still you eat every single goddamn one of them.
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flowerspoemsthe report and Woolsey is so surprised and delighted! And then he listens to it and does this fucking adorable little snort of laughter, like "Yup, that's Ronon alright".Not to mention badass!Teyla rescuing damsel-in-distress John. And Lorne running head-first into the stun-barrier hahahaha. Man, Prodigal is awesome.
All the people who suggested Teyla breastfeed Torren to keep him from fussing can bite me, because did they *see* the outfit she was wearing? Not friendly to whipping out the boob. Also, duh, she goes out on missions all the time, and Torren is almost nine months old - she might not be breastfeeding anymore, if she ever did after Kanaan came back. Not all women raise their children the same way, and it would not make her a Bad Mommy.
It really irritates me when people ignore the fact that she's a working mother (with a stay-at-home-Dad partner) and ignore the extra pressures that might put her under. Especially in *this* episode, when she explicitly talks about being exhausted, and usually having someone to help share the load, and that's *before* the adrenaline rush of escaping/hiding from Michael. Compassion, people, exercise it!
Whoops, sorry for the tl;dr.
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I love Prodigal. I'm so glad that Michael got the supervillain death unlike Kolya.