lunabee34: (writer by sukibluefiction)
NOTE: If you are looking for something specific, the dreamwidth version of my journal is a better bet than the livejournal version. I have cleaned up html errors from early days and extensively rehauled tags for better searching on the dreamwidth version only.

FANFIC MASTERLIST: These are listed in order of their post dates within each fandom. All fic has also been posted to AO3.

An asterisk (*) indicates that the fic has been remixed.











SG1 )



STAR TREK 2009 )









24/10/16 15:29
lunabee34: (end of the world by crystalchain)
I just talked to Mom, and Dad's chemo is not working. They're starting a new kind of treatment and getting the ball rolling to send him to Dallas for a stem cell transplant. He'd be there for five weeks in the hospital.

I know I was all optimistic that he has this treatment option, but now that we've reached this point, I find my optimism is shriveling up to be replaced with a fear that he's going to die out in Dallas or that the transplant won't work and he'll be horrifically miserable and then die. Death seems to be the common denominator in what I'm thinking about right now.

Anyway, I am really angry and scared and sad.
lunabee34: (danger zombies by theidolhands)

Poor Josh. I think he's taking it the hardest. *pets him*


I'm such a completist. I want to see how it ends and what happens, but sheesh. I'm ready for some real and true hope. After the Governor, after cannibal!Tasha Yar, Neegan just seems kind of an over-the-top caricature of a villain. I mean, how many evil, rapey, murderous despots can the show go through before it become a snoozefest? I will answer that question. And we're there already.


23/10/16 13:15
lunabee34: (spn: dean ahbl bullet by bittersweet_art)
1. cut for talk of weight loss ) :D

2. Gotham )

3. Best episode of Lucifer ever or bestest episode of Lucifer ever?! Lucifer )

4. Downton )

4. Emma and I watched some more SPN last night, and I was really annoyed by Dean. It was the episode where Cas is working at the gas station, and Dean is a dick about Cas working there, like he thinks it's demeaning or only about him trying to sleep with a girl. No, Dean, Cas is working at a gas station because he has no money and nowhere to sleep or live and nothing to eat, and you threw him out of a safe refuge and left him to fend for himself when he has very few real world skills, and you're going to scoff at him for working so he can eat and for taking pride in that work? Oh, fuck you very much Dean Winchester. You have been a very tone deaf asshole this episode. Wow.
lunabee34: (fancrone by chinashop)
Josh is away at a party, and I would love to talk to you guys about anything really, but here are some talking points:

1. Give me your Game of Thrones predictions. How will it end? What plots points will be resolved and how? What will happen to your favorite characters?

2. How would you have ended Penny Dreadful? Rewrite that awful ending for me, my friends. Or if you, *gasp*, liked it, tell me why. I'd love to see a ray of sunshine in that ending.

3. Tell what you would have done for a sixth season of Stargate Atlantis or an eleventh season of SG-1. What would you have the Gateverse people get up to?

4. What do you hope to see on this new Star Trek show? Is it true that it will only be available on some weird streaming channel that you have to sign up for? *sad face*

Tell me something. Ask me something. :)
lunabee34: (end of the world by crystalchain)
I was raised in the evangelical community (Southern Baptist to be specific), so everything I'm saying in this post comes from that perspective: fundamentalist, evangelical, Protestant, Southern, primarily rural.

I should say upfront that I have a knee jerk reaction against Christianity that I still struggle with because I did not know until I was an adult that a person could be Christian without also being racist, sexist, and homophobic to varying degrees. Christianity was synonymous with those behaviors for me. I didn't realize when I was growing up that Christian communities where women are pastors or gay people are an active and welcomed part of the congregation or people of all races mingle exist because I'd never seen anything like that in person. Those communities simply do not exist in the South outside of major urban areas like Atlanta, and this was before the ubiquity of the internet that might have allowed me to discover those communities online.

All my family on both sides is Southern Baptist and almost everyone I interacted with growing up belonged to some version of evangelical Protestantism. I have escaped. I am not Protestant any longer. I converted to Catholicism in my mid-twenties because my husband comes from a Catholic family, and I was looking for something to fill the spiritual void I felt/feel. Catholicism really didn't really fill that lack, and I suppose I am now agnostic.

Because I am surrounded by people who are Protestant in the community where I live and work and because my entire family is Protestant, I've been thinking a great deal this election cycle about how people who are Christian and who claim that their Christianity informs all their decisions could vote for Donald Trump--a person whose behavior and beliefs run directly counter to Christianity (I think I'd use the words mutually exclusive to describe Trump's relationship to Christianity).

I've come up with a few answers, and the thread you will see running through them is hypocrisy. As a member of the evangelical community and now as an outsider, the number one characteristic I would ascribe to this group of people is hypocrisy. Lots and lots of hypocrisy.

Cut for length )

So, that's your helping of despair for the day. I can't wait for this election to be over.
lunabee34: (reading by thelastgoodname)
1. I've been thinking about writing an essay about why I think evangelical Christians are so willing to vote for Trump. I was raised in that tradition (Southern Baptist), and it makes no sense on the surface why people who not only say they are Christian but who claim to make every decision in their lives based on that Christianity would support Trump, but having been a part of that culture for the first 18 years of my life, I have some ideas about why they're doing so. But I've also been thinking that plenty of other people have written about this, and I don't know that I have anything new to say or offer about the subject, so. IDK

2. We finished our rewatch of Treme. One half of the couple we watched it with used to live in Louisiana and is an accomplished musician who often played gigs in NOLA. So that added an extra layer of fun to the rewatch; they'd often comment about places featured, or he'd have stories about the musicians in the episodes. SPOILERS )

3. We are almost done with Downton Abbey season two. We finished all the regular episodes and only have the Christmas Special left to watch.


I can't wait to see where the story goes. I am actually sad that Walking Dead is resuming because it means no more Downton Abbey for awhile.

4. [personal profile] executrix sent me a biography of Jane Austen (Jane Austen: A Life by Claire Tomalin) which was really interesting. I knew nothing about her life, so everything was pretty much new to me. This is a very thorough, heavily researched book which I would recommend to anyone interested in her. I have to admit that from time to time I got a little confused because the cast of characters, so to speak, is so large and so many people in her family and life shared names; I just wanted to read it for entertainment and not take notes or anything, but reading it that way did mean that I was a little bit lost from time to time.

I have two main takeaways from the book. First, how horrible that so many of her letters and documents were destroyed. I wonder if they were truly scandalous (I doubt it), or if that notion of privacy (that regardless of their content, the public at large shouldn't be able to read her letters and that wanting to do so was born of prurient interest) which was beginning already to erode with the explosion of celebrity culture and mass media was largely responsible.

Second, I wonder if she was happy to stay single or if she considered her life tragic. The book posits that her first, truncated romance with Tom Lefroy was very dear to her and that she was very hung up on him and hurt when he was essentially forbidden to see her. Tomalin offers some evidence that Austen was thinking about him three years after that romance had ended. It also mentions that she initially accepted and then turned down a proposal from a man she was friends with but had no romantic feelings for. My take on it is that she'd watched all the women around her have ungodly amounts of children and a number of them die in childbirth and maybe she was grateful to escape that horror. IDK I mean, it can certainly be both. What do y'all think (about anything relating to her life)?
lunabee34: (are those men kissing? by animekittysama)
1. I mean, I think his influence on American music (and global music, probably) is undeniable although I cannot offer any compelling supporting evidence as I know virtually nothing about music. But the Nobel for literature? Don't we have enough awesome writers writing what is indisputably literature to go through before we start expanding the definition of literature? I expected to see everybody posting about this, and no one has yet. I want to know what you think, my friends (especially [personal profile] likeadeuce who does have music knowledge).

2. I went to MS this weekend to see Dad. He was doing really well, having his best weekend since he started treatment. He had some tests done today; if the treatments aren't working well enough, he'll go out to Dallas to have a stem cell transplant. Obviously, we'd like for the treatment to be working well enough that he can finish up at home without having to spend a month in the hospital two states away, but how awesome that he has more options if this first one isn't working as well as they'd like. They have a good support network; somebody called or came over every few hours like clockwork while I was there to do or bring them stuff. I feel really good about how he's doing and how they're being supported. I'm tired as shit because it's about 15 hours round trip if you don't stop for lunch, but it was good to visit with them.

3. So much TV to review:

Gotham )

Lucifer )


Blue Bloods )
lunabee34: (Default)
Josh and I watched the first episode of Westworld last night. Wow. Lots to say about this one.


On the whole, I liked this even though it made me really uncomfortable in places.
lunabee34: (Default)
My RL friend is fandom adjacent but had never written any fanfic until she got inspired by Lucifer; she sent me this vignette by email and then gave me permission to post it here for everyone else to enjoy.

Fiddling with the Devil by Ashland Carlisle )
lunabee34: (yuletide: is it yuletide yet by liviapen)
1. I received my letters from the Letter Writing Challenge! I got a fantastic letter from [personal profile] leesa_perrie all about her childhood pet rabbit along with some cool butterfly stickers that I am absolutely not allowing Fiona to have. I also got a wonderful letter from [personal profile] teaotter, which is a tour of her bookshelves, along with this gorgeous card. I hope to start hearing soon from my fellow challenge participants about their correspondence.

2. Shopping for birthday gifts for two RL friends who share the same birthday went well today. We'll have a little party on Sunday night right before we watch Downton Abbey.

3. Emma ran much better at her race yesterday. Her time was faster, but she also just looked different when she was running--less sluggish and more fierce than earlier in the season. She was really pleased with herself, and so was I. Fiona told her, "I'm so proud of you. You run very fast."

4. I enjoyed NCIS this week. SPOILERS )

5. A review of the Urban Decay Anti-Aging Eyeshadow Primer Potion. The primers I've used before are silicone based, I think, and operate on the same principle as icing a cake: you can cover up any imperfections in the surface of the cake by spreading on the icing. These primers make your skin have a soft, velvety texture. The Urban Decay primer has a totally different texture. It's rough and tacky almost. Rather than your shadow sliding on, it instantly sticks. The primer works; my eyeshadow lasts and doesn't crease. But it took some getting used to because I generally blend my eyeshadow, and shadow just stays on where you put it. You can't really blend it into another color or do a slow fade upwards if that makes any sense (not without applying a whole lot more shadow than I want to, at any rate). So, I give it an 87/100.
lunabee34: (Default)
1. In an effort to win the title of Pettiest Person Ever to Live, I got my feelings hurt when my mom's weekly update on Dad's condition mentioned everyone in their community who had brought them food or done things for them plus my brother who visited once this week but did not mention the cards I've sent or the calls I've made.


I have a great ambivalence over not being present. On the one hand, I hate that I'm not there to help (and I know I would be visiting them more often, taking over the shopping, running errands, etc., cooking, in a way that my brother is not); on the other hand, I'm glad I don't have to figure out how I am going to handle my Dad hollering at me disrespectfully when he's not just my dad but My Dad Who Has Cancer.

2. In much less selfish and petty news, Downton Abbey was great this weekend. We are going to watch two episodes the next two Sundays and so finish season two before Walking Dead starts up again. SPOILERS )



5. My google-fu is failing me. Can anybody point me to icons of Hillary Clinton and icons for the show Lucifer?
lunabee34: (food:  sushi color by cattyhunts)
1. cut for talk of weight loss )

2. I don't think I mentioned that my missing period got found. I went eight weeks without a period and then I had a really, really horrible one to make up for the one I skipped. LOL

3. I am such a bad mod. I mailed off my letters for the Letter Writing Challenge today. *headdesk* They had to be postmarked today, so I shall not ban myself from future participation in my own challenge LOL but way to procrastinate, Lorraine. I had a lot of fun writing the letters, though, and got to use some cute stationery. I can't wait to start hearing from people as they receive their correspondence.

4. Gotta go sign up for Yuletide. I've got my requests down, but now I need to figure what I'm offering. Is there a way to tell what people have requested? I've been looking at the letters spreadsheet but not everybody writes a letter.
lunabee34: (yuletide: kitty by chomiji)
Thank you so much for writing a story for me. I know I will love it. I will tell you some of the things I like about the fandoms I've chosen, but I hope you write the story that makes you happy, the story you've been wanting to write.

Please write whatever you want--mpreg, character death, crossover, coffee shop AU, gen, het, slash, femslash, porn or no porn, whatever. I used to write in this portion of my letter that I was unsquickable, but that's sadly not the case anymore. I really cannot handle reading about child death or child harm now; I get stuck in intrusive thought loops and can't stop thinking about it and becoming more and more anxious. Child death/harm is the only no-go for me, though. Whatever else you want to include in your story is A-OK by me.

Requests for Penny Dreadful, Lucifer, and Live Free or Die Hard )
lunabee34: (yuletide: is it yuletide yet by liviapen)
1. The time, it is upon us. I am contemplating the following for offer/request in Yuletide:

Imperial Radch
Jane Eyre
Mrs. Todd's Shortcut
Poems (Poe)
Tiffany Aching series
Wuthering Heights
The Yellow Wallpaper
Live Free or Die Hard
Jessica Jones
Penny Dreadful

2. I often read my network page, and I happened across someone whose dad has just been diagnosed with the same cancer as my dad. Would it be weird to reach out? It feels like it might be weird.

3. I did a little research about puberty and athletic performance in girls, and looks like puberty does often mean a decrease in running performance for a variety of reasons. I am relieved because I had started to worry that maybe something was wrong. If she can just stick with it, Emma should come out the other side alright.

4. I am done with my tagging project. Whoooooo! I realized about halfway through that I had missed a few things in the beginning years (for example, I didn't start tagging for music until I was well into the project), but I'll be damned if I go back through the whole thing again. It's as good as it's going to get. LOL

5. We watched Die Hard 2 yesterday. It is not nearly as good a movie as the first one for a couple of reasons. First, the villain is in a remote location and rarely interacts with McClane. One of the joys of Die Hard is that Hans Gruber is such a charismatic villain. He's in the same physical location with McClane for the whole movie; they're playing cat and mouse; they're talking on the walkie talkies. That's entirely absent from the sequel. The stakes also don't feel as high as they did in the first movie. I don't have a clear sense of who this general is and why he's such hot shit that so many people are willing to give up their careers for him. Plus, something about Hans Gruber manhandling Holly makes me worry about her in a way that her circling the airport endlessly never could (even if Gruber shooting her and her plane falling out of the sky make her equally dead). I like that Team Villain and Team Good Guys are multi-racial in both movies. Not much for the ladies to do in either of these movies although I would argue that Holly gets a good role and gets to play more than a victim in both. Josh and I about died at the end of the sequel, though, where McClane wanders around hollering, "Holly!" We both said, "Stella!" at the same time. It was more than a bit ridiculous.

6. Downton Abbey watching continues. SPOILERS )
lunabee34: (die hard: first movie john)
1. I cannot believe that I didn't post a movie review of Live Free or Die Hard in my journal. *boggles* I've gotten half-way through 2015 in my tagging project, and I suddenly realized that I didn't remember reading a Die Hard movie review. I went back through painstakingly, and sure enough, I never reviewed the movie. I am shocked. I had so much fun writing and reading in that fandom; I can't believe I didn't review the movie. The first Die Hard has been on like every five minutes this month, so I watched it with Emma. It's a great movie, but I think Live Free or Die Hard is the best of the franchise. Die Hard revolutionized the action movie genre. It becomes a movie which the action movies to follow emulate and then later try to subvert. Die Hard is earnest; it's got some humor, but that's not foregrounded in the movie. McClane is also allowed to be vulnerable in the first movie in a way that is totally endearing. Live Free or Die Hard, though, is just magic. It's such a meta movie. It's so funny, and it makes such splendid fun of itself--constantly scrutinizing and reveling in what makes an action movie and an action hero. It's also got genuine pathos, just enough to give the movie depth. Love it, love it, love it.

2. I got a full body mole scan and have been pronounced cancer free! The dermatologist also cut open these two little places on my face, one under each eye. They're basically whiteheads, but I've had them for years and years, so she was unable to just squeeze them out. She gave me a cream to put on them which should get rid of them in time. For now, though, I look like I have prison tattoos, a drop of blood under each eye. LOL

3. Dad seems to be doing a bit better, having a bit of an upswing in mental and physical health. *crosses fingers that it will last*

4. Fi got sick, had a cold like a normal child, and did not get pneumonia. Hallelujah, I think her lungs have gotten strong enough that we're not going to be in the ER every five seconds this year.

5. Emma's run times are much slower this year than last year despite practicing more diligently on the off season and going to more official practices than were held in the spring season. I wonder if her growing (getting taller, center of gravity changing, etc) could be affecting her performance. Thoughts? I might ask on that bodies in motion comm.
lunabee34: (disney hair by phchiu)
1. Yesterday was pretty awful for my mom and dad. Mom was driving him to his chemo appointment, and he suddenly passed out and started throwing up while he was unconscious. So they got to spend the day in the ER. He didn't have a stroke or heart attack. They think he had a vasovagal response which is apparently not a big deal (except for how my mom was certain he was dying and now she is unwilling to leave him alone for even a second; she's talking about getting some kind of continuous monitor for him to wear and not going to things because she doesn't want to leave him alone, and I get it, I do, I do, but she is going to burn out spectacularly if she lives at this height of anxiety for long). I wish I wasn't so far away. I feel very guilty about that.

2. I got a package of perfume from [personal profile] theora! Whoooo! I hope all my packages made it safely to their new homes.

3. I bought some makeup from Ulta, and it arrived a couple days ago. I've purchased from Sephora before and had really good experiences with them, but I was suckered in by how many free gift with purchase options there are on Ulta. Word of warning if you buy from them: they charge you for the purchase before it ships (even though the website says it only charges once something ships) and your order will say "processing" for far longer than you think it should before it actually ships. That being said, I am super pleased with what I got. I got the Urban Decay Anti-Aging Eye Primer and an Urban Decay eye pencil in a gorgeous purple (I've been wanting a purple eyeliner but ended up not caring for the Mary Kay one I got from mother-in-law; not purple enough) which came with a free gift of a small version of the Urban Decay Original Eye Primer and an Urban Decay eye shadow in a really flattering peachy pink. I also got the Smashbox Photo Finish Face primer which came with a free gift of a travel size version, a tiny lip gloss (which looks terrible on me but not so bad on Emma who doesn't want it; I think I'm going to see if the Sunday night crowd is interested), and a makeup bag. The Smashbox Face Primer is amazing, y'all. I had been using Clinique Superprimer Universal Face Primer (a good product for a good price), and the Smashbox is like diamonds next to Clinique's CZ. It is so soft and luxurious feeling. I really, really like it. Solid recs for everything I bought except the eyeliner because I haven't worn it yet. I liked the feeling of the lip gloss, just not the color. Ulta also sent me samples of Clinique Foaming Sonic Soap which is intended for use with their facial scrub brush system, but I just used my hands and really liked it. They also sent me a CC cream sample that I tossed because it was way too dark for me.

4. We have been watching Downton Abbey on Sunday nights and just finished the first season. Don't spoil me, please! I have somehow remained entirely unspoiled for anything that happens. I am really, really liking the show. The clothes and house porn alone are an amazing draw. And I love the characters so much. I love all the downstairs people except for O'Brien and Thomas (OMG, what horrific people). And I love all the upstairs people, too. I started out with a strong dislike of Mary that has slowly turned to solid love, and Edith is so nasty sometimes but I can totally see why she feels driven to behave the way she does. I can't wait to see where the show goes. I am hoping so much for a Bates/Anna romance. I am shipping it hard, hard, hard, hard, hard. Hard.

5. I am really proud of myself. I got back into the gym this week and have been every day. Now to keep up the momentum!
lunabee34: (Default)
As I suspected, my OBGYN was all, "Yes. You are not having a period. Excellent observational skills. Now pay the lady a hundred and fifty dollars on your way out."

It wasn't quite that bad; he's a good doctor and not dismissive, but I am so tired of every single doctor's visit being a mere confirmation that, yes, something is wrong with me, but no we're not going to do anything about it. I would like to have an actionable problem, my friends. LOL

Anyway, he said that if I go three cycles without a period to come back when I'm at the end of the off week of my birth control (taking birth control interferes with tests for menopause), so we'll see.

I also made an appointment with a dermatologist for next week. I've got a friend who has had numerous cancerous lesions removed in the past year which made me think I probably ought to have a full body check myself just to be sure.

And now for something completely different. I have been watching Tiny House Nation and coming up against a brick wall of understanding. I truly do not understand why anyone would choose to live in a tiny space. I mean, I get it on an intellectual level (wanting to reduce your energy footprint or spend less of your income on bills or as a matter of necessity in a major urban center), and I'd also get it if these houses were ever intended for one person to live in. But no, it's always a couple and sometimes a family with children and pets.

Part of my inability to get it is a product of my upbringing. I was raised with rural values. My parents taught me that owning land is paramount. They didn't have a huge house but it's four bedroom (because you have to be able to sleep everybody when they come to visit). I have never lived anywhere that space was at a premium. When we first moved here (my first real stint at living in a neighborhood), the houses being so close together was a real adjustment for me.

I don't need to live in a mansion, but I cannot imagine living in a tiny house. I cannot imagine sleeping in a loft bedroom in which I cannot even stand up straight. I cannot imagine being able to stretch out my arms and touch both walls of my living room. I think I would be so anxious (where do you go to get away from people?) and claustrophobic. Also, I do not have a lot of stuff. I have a very pared down closet. We don't own knickknacks. But I have a ton of books and a ton of dishes, and I wouldn't want to get rid of them. I definitely think too much stuff (and too much of the wrong stuff) is a Real Thing, but I don't agree that just Stuff in General is Bad.

What do y'all think? Could you live in a tiny house (gladly or only begrudgingly and of necessity)? Do you need your space?


lunabee34: (Default)

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