lunabee34

1. Dylan has been accepted into grad school with a tuition waiver and stipend! We are so happy for them. They graduate with an undergraduate degree in anthropology on May 1.

2. I took Fiona to get her ears pierced. She is enormously proud of herself. It's pretty fricking adorable.

*Apparently one of her classes at school has a playlist of music they listen to while doing group work, and the teacher has put lots of music from the 90s on it, so Fiona has started to develop an interest in alternative music from that decade. She asked me if she could listen to a couple of Weezer songs she had looked up that weren't on the playlist, and after that, I played "Undone (The Sweater Song)" for her, and she looked at me with all the gravitas of an NPR music critic and said, "That's so Weezer." LOL

3. For anyone following along, I have reversed my opinion on the Living Proof Full Volume and Texture Spray. My hair is just too thin for it and because I have to rewet my hair pretty copiously to refresh at all, it just turns into a sticky mess. I think it would work really well for people with thicker, curlier hair than mine. I have gone back to thinking the Bumble and Bumble counterpart product is superior.

4. ( book reviews of Spiner, Beerbohm, and Urrea )

I also reread Ouida's Syrlin, which I'm contemplating nominating for Yuletide this year.

1. I got Christmas cards from lyr and minoanmiss! <3

2. My maternal grandmother died yesterday at the glorious age of 97. She kept her marbles to the very end, she never had to be hospitalized, and she died in her own home surrounded by her children. The last couple months of her life she experienced some discomfort, but she was never in a lot of pain and never had any serious illnesses. She lived the dream, y'all. I'm sad but not overly so, you know? This is the way life is supposed to go. I spoke to her on Christmas Day, and she said talking to me was all the Christmas present she needed. :D We'll be traveling to MS to the funeral in a couple of days.

3. I can't wait for Yuletide reveals! I am dying to know who wrote everything and to tell you all about what I wrote. :D

4. I've got some work to do on my classes before they start on the 10th, but I've decided that it's actually not as much as I thought and that I'm not going to worry about it as a consequence. I'll do it when we get back from the funeral.

5. On this last day of 2023, I am thinking about how grateful I am for you all. Your love, support, and encouragement have carried me through a very difficult year, and I know they will continue to sustain me in the coming one. <3

Yesterday while talking with the kiddos, Josh's mom just casually drops that Josh's dad has been in a car wreck and is in the ER. She doesn't seem particularly concerned about this, so the kids hang up with her and tell Josh. Josh calls her back, and she doesn't know where the wreck happened or where the car is or how severe the the wreck was or how badly Josh's dad is injured.

So Josh and his sister enter crisis mode.

This has been the worst case scenario for a long time. What happens to Josh's mom if something happens to Josh's dad? She can't be left alone. She can't drive (although she thinks she can and sometime does). She can't even remember shortly after being told the details of what has happened to her husband who is in the ER.

So, Sarah manages to get ahold of her dad. He was not in a wreck. He was at the gas station and passed out and was taken to the ER as a consequence. His skin is tissue paper thin, so when he fell, all the skin on one of his arms just sloughed off; that appears to be his major injury (along with whatever made him pass out in the first place). Sarah also called the gas station where it happened and talked to the person on duty who was there when it happened, and she said that her dad told the EMTs he was fine and just wanted to go home but then passed out again when he tried to stand, so they were all like, "Nope. You're going to the hospital. Also, you have no skin on your arm, and you're covered in blood, old man."

Meanwhile, Josh gets ahold of a family friend to come be with his mom because I said, "Baby, what if the hospital calls her to come up there because something is going terribly wrong?" and all the blood drained out of his face.

Sarah got ahold of her dad's boss to take care of getting the car back home and getting rid of the spoiled groceries because Josh's mom was volunteering to drive the car back with family friend following, and none of us were having that (not to mention she would have to drive through Flowood, and if any of you know Jackson, Flowood cops are just itching to give anybody a ticket).

Then we had to worry about whether the ER was going to discharge his dad in the middle of the night because they couldn't find anything wrong with him, but they admitted him.

At least his dad can answer questions about what's going on and remember what the doctor says because it's a nightmare when his mom is hospitalized trying to get any accurate information about what's happening.

Thoughts, prayers, and general exhortations to the universe are all welcome, my friends.

1. Josh is a lying liar who lies, so he told us he was feeling better while the rest of us were at my parents', and though it is true that the intense, protracted bout of vomiting that began this whole thing has not been repeated, he has been so so ill. We are just waiting on the culture to finish so he can get the meds he needs, and I am so angry they didn't call him yesterday because they damn sure aren't going to call him today since it's a holiday. He is so so miserable. I would not wish cdiff on anyone.

His foot surgery has been canceled, and I am relieved. But I am also a bit worried because the surgery is to repair a tear in the tendon, and I worry that putting it off means that the tear will just get worse. Now he won't be able to have it until December. Our offices are not ADA-compliant; they are only accessible by stairs (I know), and also it will just be an enormous pain in the ass to recover from the surgery while working and much easier to do it during our off time. Sigh.

2. If you are in the market for some beautiful, handcrafted jewelry, check out OiShiny on Etsy. The wire work on these necklaces is amazing. I have two of them already and just ordered a couple more. They are even more beautiful in person; photos and videos can't really capture how pretty the stones are.

3. The roof is leaking over the bathroom again because, of course, it is.


* If you sing about making a beautiful mistake in your bed, the conclusion I'm drawing is not the one you intend.

1. Josh got sick on my birthday, so we weren't able to Go To Town and have a date like we'd planned, but the kids gave me the sweetest gifts--some stickers, an emery board shaped like a cat, purple paperclips, and a collection of face masks.

2. gloss wrote me the splendor splits, a genderbent Moths AU that is pushing all my buttons. Go read!

3.

Life of Samuel Johnson by James Boswell

My rating: 5 of 5 stars


Boswell really sets the conventions for the genre of biography. He's biased; he wants to present his friend, mentor, and pseudo-father in the best light. But he also is committed to what he sees as truth--revealing the truth about Johnson even when it is not flattering or might even be something Johnson wouldn't have wanted revealed. I also am impressed by his commitment to citing his sources, to including letters, to speaking to the people involved in situations, and to avoiding speculation about people's motivations or their thoughts as much as possible. His bio is so much better researched and cited than many early 20th-century bios that don't cite sources or which endlessly and baselessly speculate or psychoanalyze (I'm thinking of Ouida's various biographers here). And especially early 20th-century literary criticism that will just quote someone with no attribution or say the quote is by that esteemed Chalmundey as if I'm supposed to know who that is or when or where or under what circumstances the illustrious Chalmundey uttered this wisdom. So frustrating.

I find both Boswell and Johnson sexist and racist at times. While Johnson is pro-abolition, Boswell is pro-slavery. Both of them, however, are convinced of the inferiority of people who aren't white. I also find their treatment of Mrs. Thrale pretty infuriating. I don't think Johnson ever thought to marry her, but all his friends pretty clearly thought he'd marry her after Mr. Thrale died, and even if Johnson had no aspirations of marrying her, he clearly thought he was going to continue as a member of her household until he died and she and her daughters would caretake for him. Who can blame the woman for remarrying when she fell in love again? And who can blame her for not wanting to spend however many years caretaking for a difficult man she wasn't even related to who spent a lot of time criticizing her and belittling women in general? It's truly a mystery. LOL

On the whole, though, the deep friendship between Boswell and Johnson is endearing to read about as is Boswell's genuine joy at being chosen to be the dearest friend of such a literary lion.



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1. Last week, the President of the university emailed to ask if he could call me, which naturally made me feel as if I was being called into the principal's office. LOL But I was not in trouble. Instead, he asked me to be part of the SACS Reaffirmation Leadership Team, which consists of five members--the President, the Provost, the Chief Financial Officer, the university's SACS liaison (who is also the Special Assistant to the President), and a faculty rep (me!). He had some very flattering things to say about me in requesting my participation. He was very careful to only ask me to participate for this upcoming year, but it's a three-year gig, and clearly he'd like me to do all three years, and, of course, I will.

Y'all, this is so my jam. I love seeing how the sausage is made. Also, I'll be Senate Chair for one more year next year, and then that's over, and I'll need to do something else for service. This gives me two more years of really high profile, important, exceeds-expectations level service without having to serve on multiple committees. Whoooo!

The first big item is a trip to a meeting in Florida in December. I am already fretting about the travel. Josh has told me I cannot fret until at least October. LOL

2. My other birthday present from Josh has arrived, and I am besotted, y'all. So in addition to a new wallet, I also got a new purse. Both my old wallet and purse are older than Fiona, and both have held up really well for being cheap and made of cheap materials. But they are both starting to look ragged, so replacement time!

I got the large Emily purse from the Purse Peddlers on Etsy, and it is glorious. The leather is so soft and supple, and it smells divine. It's very roomy but not too large; the lining is random, and I ended up with a lovely textured grey lining. My favorite feature is one I didn't even know I was getting when I purchased it. Right inside the top of the purse, they've fixed a snap and put a leather key fob there so you can snap your keys right to the top of your purse and never have to hunt for them. How utterly clever! I have never seen that feature in a purse before, but it is so smart. The leather fob is supple and I don't think it would hold up long term if I used it as my actual keyring, so I'm going to buy a small carabiner clip to replace the keyring; I'll leave the fob snapped in the purse and just clip my keys on it. That will preserve the life of it. If you are in the market for a new purse I can't recommend this store highly enough; they do topnotch work, and they have tons of purse models.

3. I got other birthday gifts, too!

executrix sent me a fabulous box of books: poetry, women on writing, essays, a journal full of quotes about freaking out LOL, and Ouida's In a Winter City! It's an early 1920s pocket edition, and it's wonderful. I've been petting it.

I also got the most wonderful gifts from amejisuto: a gorgeous tea cup with pink and purple jeweled flowers and a jeweled spoon (she has a similar cup and said it's like we're having tea together, which I love!), some caramel apple tea to drink in this beautiful cup, and a journal with all-black pages. I can't wait to use my white and metallic pens in this journal.

1. I am very proud of myself. When Fiona dropped my phone and shattered the bottom of the screen at the end of April, I just shrugged and put some scotch tape over it and went on with life. I am not about to spend 300-500 dollars to replace it since it still functions, and the tape has prevented the cracks from spreading and also my finger from getting shredded. When my laptop suffered the bluescreen of death at the end of April right before finals, I also just shrugged and got the previous laptop out of the closet. It functions just fine except that the top of it is hanging on by a thread to the bottom of it (after I dropped it years ago *woe woe*), so it can only be used on the desk as a stationary object with something behind the top propping it up. As of right now, I don't plan to replace it any time soon because . . . we have to replace our AC. I was hoping we could go one more year, but alack and alas, no. So we're getting a heat pump instead of a traditional AC, and because that'll be like 8k, I'm just going to deal with the old laptop for awhile, probably until Christmas. But all these things would have sent me into an anxiety spiral a year ago (something about tech/appliance failure makes my lizard brain go into flight mode), and I am handling them with a degree of calm that surprises me and makes me think my medicine is probably working. LOL

2. Y'all, menopause is making my hair curly. It's nuts. So far it's mostly curly on the sides in the front from the crown to about chin-level, which is annoying because my hair is really long. So it's this bizarre half and half thing where the bottom half is a smidge wavy and the back is maybe a little wavy but not really, but the sides are curling up pretty good. If it continues to get wavier/curlier, I'll probably cut it shorter and see if I can roll with the curly/wavy. I found this awesome product, though, that if your hair is wavy/curly, you should give a try: Odele Air Dry Styler. You just put it in towel-dried hair and let it air dry. I was shocked by the degree to which it amplified the curliness of my hair.

3. I would also like to recommend Dr. Teal's Lemon Balm Epsom Salts. OMG, y'all this smells so good. The bathroom smelled amazing for two days after I used this. Just be sure to never let Epsom salts get on your hair; they will dry it the fuck out.

1. I got the cutest cat mug with some lovely tea to brew in it from amejisuto! <3 <3

And a postcard from oracne! <3 <3


2. I finally signed the contract with MLA for that book chapter they accepted on teaching Harriet Jacobs literally years ago before the pandemic, so looks like that is actually coming out this year. I'll believe it when I hold it in my hot little hands. LOL


3. We spent a great day searching out a new cologne for Josh since his beloved Fresh Cannabis Santal has been discontinued. I think he has settled on Atkinsons 41 Burlington Arcade. It has some of the same notes as his beloved scent (patchouli, musk, vetiver), but introduces some new notes that he really likes (me, too LOL).

I'm digging the new perfume lines that Dillards is carrying; the flagship in Atlanta has even more brands that I wanted to smell. I was disappointed that Jo Malone and Van Cleef and Arpels, for example, are only stocked there.



4.

Quarterly Review of Literature by T. Weiss

My rating: 4 of 5 stars


So, apparently the Quarterly Review of Literature once held an international poetry book competition, and they would publish the winners (4-6) in one volume; I can't tell how often the competition ran (yearly?) or if it still runs, but the winners got a chapbook of poetry published, a thousand dollar prize, and a hundred books, which is a pretty sweet deal.

This volume contains Dissolving Borders by Lynne Knight, Moondog by Jean Hollander, The Weight of the Heart by David Citino, Is This the Way to Athens? by Barbara D. Holender, and Across Bucharest after Rain by Maria 'Banus in translation by Diana Der-Hovanessian and Mary Mattfield.

Really enjoy Knight's collection (although the preponderance of seed for semen gets tedious), Citino's collection, and Holender's collection. Do not care for Hollander's collection at all and am mostly neutral to 'Banus's collection.



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1. I got the most amazing hand-drawn postcard from elfin!

2. Classes started back. Spoiler alert: I'm exhausted. LOL I'm doing that lovely thing where by the end of the day I feel feverish, like I have the flu. (No worries; I don't actually have a fever.) But I only have to be on campus two days a week this semester, and I'm hoping the work from home days will help mitigate the fatigue.

3. I'm not doing an end-of-the-year reflection post where I assess how I did on my 2022 goals and make some new ones for 2023. For the past several years, it's just been an accounting of how I only met one or two of my goals and did terribly on the rest, and that kind of post does not spark joy. I'm still reflecting on 2022 and making goals for 2023, I'm just doing it in my paper journal.

4. Thursday night, I went to see the Legally Blonde musical, and it was fantastic! It was an off-Broadway production, so the cast was phenomenal. I really enjoyed the way the show has been updated from the movie. Definitely recommend.

5. I gave up caffeine because I read that people with fatigue who are heavy caffeine users often create a crash effect that exacerbates their fatigue. I was drinking between two and four full-size Coke Zeroes in the morning + some black tea, so that seemed a reasonable possibility to me. I stopped caffeine on December 27 and have had no positive effects on fatigue. If anything I am more noticeably fatigued. Do y'all think it's been long enough that if giving up caffeine was going to magically make me less tired, it would have done so by now? Or do I need to give it some more time?

1. It was indeed an accidental banning! I have been unbanned! Hurray!

2. I have finished and uploaded my story for Yuletide. Note to self: Do not ever leave it this late ever again. We are going back to our regular get-her-done-by-Thanksgiving posting schedule next year come hell or high water.

3. I got my bivalent COVID booster on Thursday, and it is kicking my ass. While it has not kicked my ass as thoroughly as all the previous COVID vaccines, it is still wreaking some merry havoc with my immune system. I thought I had escaped any terrible side effects because I got it on Thursday morning and was pretty much fine all Thursday; my arm didn't even really hurt. Friday, I woke up and was exhausted. My arm was killing me, and everywhere I already hurt because of my autoimmune stuff hurt like eleventy billion times more. By the time I went to bed last night, I had a lovely red circle where I was injected, and my armpit lymph node was starting to swell. I am not as tired this morning, and I don't hurt as badly everywhere else, but my lymph node is killing me. Oh well, it could be worse. I had a fever and flu-like symptoms last time.

4. Emma is 20 years old today. :D

5. I love everyone in this bar.